ya dads aren't the best wingmen
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Randomize
