I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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