Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
