Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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