Yo dont text me then not text me
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Randomize
