I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
