Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
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