How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
