She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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