I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
That's when you crack a 10am beer
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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