We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Randomize