Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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