Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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