i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
