What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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