Texts From Last Night

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  (305): View more from Florida

  your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise

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  (305): your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise http://tfl.nu/rpa6
  Replies (5) Good night (992) Bad night (637) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened

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  (978): i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened http://tfl.nu/l318
  Replies (23) Good night (926) Bad night (7084) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!

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  (914): After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT! http://tfl.nu/umoe
  Replies (129) Good night (6186) Bad night (584) Order T-Shirt
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible

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  (573): Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible http://tfl.nu/a2el
  Replies (31) Good night (885) Bad night (3272) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair

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  (513): I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair http://tfl.nu/zl2m
  Replies (35) Good night (4682) Bad night (747) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.

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  (214): Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree. http://tfl.nu/bwsc
  Replies (11) Good night (4070) Bad night (1554) Order T-Shirt
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  (+91): View more from India

  I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.

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  (+91): I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin. http://tfl.nu/d09o
  Replies (7) Good night (2693) Bad night (1098) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting

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  (804): Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting http://tfl.nu/9m8j
  Replies (5) Good night (3810) Bad night (909) Order T-Shirt
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.

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  (479): You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it. http://tfl.nu/l6w1
  Replies (2) Good night (2150) Bad night (673) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass

  (240): View more from Maryland

  He should have died. Natural selection.

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  (301): Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass (240): He should have died. Natural selection. http://tfl.nu/8itz
  Replies (13) Good night (2540) Bad night (654)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!

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  (704): To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast. (704): Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger! http://tfl.nu/sya3
  Replies (8) Good night (1267) Bad night (496)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.

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  (215): I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing. http://tfl.nu/pyii
  Replies (15) Good night (1492) Bad night (334) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.

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  (727): She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public. http://tfl.nu/wfd0
  Replies (3) Good night (824) Bad night (459) Order T-Shirt
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  (323): View more from California

  Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...

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  (323): Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow... http://tfl.nu/iqf2
  Replies (5) Good night (1086) Bad night (175) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.

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  (330): Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive. http://tfl.nu/6c5n
  Replies (2) Good night (469) Bad night (146) Order T-Shirt

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