I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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