What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
