A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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