you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
