he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
