I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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