Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
