your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Randomize
