i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
