I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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