Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
i need some magic done to my vagina
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
