i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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