Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
barbara walters just said penis...
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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