She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
The Olympian is in my bed
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
