PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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