Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
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