She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
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