Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
