they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
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