Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Even my vagina gasped.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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