mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
