I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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