I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I forget how to act sober
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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