6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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