i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
third nipple confirmed
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Randomize