is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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