i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
