Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
