my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize