p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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