I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Randomize
