STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
