Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
He shit in the fireplace
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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