these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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